Mousey?

Who the HELL put my IKEA mouse on top of the shoe holder? I can't bloody reach it up there. This is NOT funny. There will be words.

Space heater = pure awesome

Why has no one introduced me to a space heater before NOW?? It's ridiculous, I've been squeezing myself underneath radiators for like my whole life, trying to get as much warmth from them as possible, and THEY SUCK! Then one day I walk into the room and BAM! there it is, like a fire in a box. Mmmmmm. Toastie. Screw you radiators, I've moved on.

Laters

p.s-The wall tastes really nice today

Sweet Revenge

Lately I've been overhearing Jen saying that I'm getting chubby. This is seriously uncool.... today is payback...

• Wake Jen up by Meowing really freaking loudly in her face: Check
• Head butt the bathroom door open while Jen's in the bath: Check
• Go to sleep on Jens new dress (Making sure to get fur ALL over it): Check
• Claws to the kneecaps: Check
• Do the annoying meow over and over again until Jen has to get up and let me out, then immediately jump back through the window: Check
• Eat all the good food so Fuzzy gets hungry and Jen has to buy some more with money she doesn't have: Check

Mwuhahahahaha

Jen:1 Bazil:6

EW

Cat biscuits??? BLORK...Where the hell is my soft food??????

Stupid Jen

I caught a mouse for Jen today. Nice gesture right? WRONG! Apparently people don't like dead mice lying on the carpet. What is wrong with them? The freaks. I showed Jen, and all she did was throw it in the bin. What a jerk. I give her a gift and this is what she does. I dunno why I even bother. To top it off, Fuzzy caught a bird and when Jen saw it she left it lying outside for like a WEEK! Oh right so if Fuzzy catches something, Jen practically pins it to the fridge. Just cause it was like three times the size of Fuzzy probably, like I can't catch a bird that could pass for an owl. Big deal. Man I'm pissed off. I'm gonna go roll around on the floor for a bit. That'll cheer me up.

Fuzzy A.K.A Needle Claws

Fuzzy has been right ANNOYING today. Just cause she's small she thinks she's king of the cats. Well she aint. She kept on jumping on me and attacking me and biting me and hitting me and it was getting right on my cat tits. So I did this proper bad ass move on her. I grabbed her by the waist, reverse style, pinned her down and kicked her in the face like a bazillion times over and over till she ran off crying . It was sweet. That sure shut her up. I am so awesome.

Breeeoow

Stupid tail, thinks he's so good...I sure showed him. The loser.